I don't know why. I wish I could recover from stuff. But it seems that once I'm hurt, I will forever be hurt. I don't hold a grudge against the person that hurt me, most often I will forgive them right away. Sometimes I'm even afraid I'm too much of a push over. Actually, to be completely honest, it isn't usually other people who hurt me. I think I do it all to myself. I invest too much, even when I know I shouldn't. It hurts to have all your hope crashing down on you. And I never learn my lesson.
But, you know, sometimes other people do hurt me too.
All in all, though, there is no healing. I can numb the pain. Ignore it, and hope it will go away some day. But it doesn't. It will always bee sitting in the back of my mind. Always ready to come back in full force whenever something reminds me of its existence.
I've been hurt a few times in my lifetime, and I can't seem to get past them. This needs to be fixed.
It also seems that all my entries on here seem to be negative, sad stuff. That needs to change as well. I can't possibly be down all the time. Next time I'll try to think of something more positive.
Simply complex, sir.
ReplyDeleteYou know, you and i have a lot in common. Ive read all your posts and i've been through or am going through those same feelings you're feeling. it's a little comforting to know im not the only one, so thanks. im actually quite surprised that someone else is feeling alot of the same stuff i am.
ReplyDeleteWallflower, that is EXACTLY why I'm doing this. I can't believe people haven't done it before. If we share these elements of life, it means that you're not alone, and that means I'm not alone.
ReplyDeleteConnecting. Feeling and being felt. That is the purpose of the internet, and of life.